Guest Entry: Mom

'PROV! has been keeping me pretty busy (it's going great, by the way, and we'll eventually be showing it at the Movie Mill) and when my Mom heard that I might not be able to put anything up this week she decided to give blogging a shot. She was a reporter at the Lethbridge Herald for many years and won the "Excellence in Education Reporting" award in Alberta four times. So I would say she is qualified to publish some work here. Without further adue, my Mom:

I’ve been a big fan of Terry’s blog since it began – I guess I have to be since I’m his mom. Regardless of the family connection, I’ve thought that Terry’s messages often have a lot of insight and show a lot of maturity – I would apply the same statement to many of the comments from his friends.

Amy, you deserve huge respect for your response to what Terry wrote. I was also really impressed with Jeff Arnold when he took responsibility and talked about the lessons he had learned following a food fight at the school cafeteria.

But what I wanted to write about more than anything else is this whole graduation thing. If all of you Grade 12 grads think it’s strange to be finished with high school and looking forward to all the incredible possibilities – I hope you’ll take a minute to think of it from the perspective of your parents.

I keep saying that I’m not old enough to have a son on the brink of turning 18 and entering university. I feel like it was just five minutes ago that he was born, blinking up at me through those gorgeous blue eyes as if to say “so you’re the one I’ve been kicking the crap out of for the last few months”.

I find myself re-thinking all the rules:

1. It’s a school night; you need to be home by 10 p.m.
2. Your homework has to be done before you go out with friends.
3. Friends have to go home before 11 p.m.
4. Don’t swear

We actually never had that many rules in our home because Terry never gave us a lot of grief. But I still find myself thinking about how to handle all the challenges to come. It’s a big world out there and the desire we have as parents to keep you safe and protected doesn’t just end because you’ve finished high school and will soon or have already crossed the threshold into adulthood.

So I guess (if Terry chooses to post this message) what I’m trying to ask is that you all cut your parents a bit of slack in the coming months… we’re also adjusting to this new reality.

My daughter (she’s 10) asked me when I’m going to “kick Terry out” (she wants his room) and I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around the day he moves out of our home. It was just he and I for so many years that I’m pretty sure the day he does move away from home will be an emotional day for me.

Still, our job as parents is to give our kids the skills, the tools they need to make it in the world so I acknowledge that one day I will help him pack his bags and I’ll cull my kitchen supplies, linens and pantry (just like my mom did for me) to help him get a good start in his new life.

But, he’s still here so I guess I can take another shot at some of the advice I’ve been giving him since Grade 7:

* Take me up on the offer to learn to do your own laundry

* Take me up on the offer to learn to cook some basic meals

* Mow the lawn every once in a while because one day you’ll have your own home and it’ll be your responsibility

* Pitch in with the household chores more frequently – when you have your own place, supper won’t miraculously appear on the table, lunch won’t be packed and ready when you leave for university or work, and the sink in the bathroom won’t be wiped clear of toothpaste when you’re not looking (somebody actually does those things)

And above all, enjoy life. Pursue a career that you know will be fun as well as rewarding and challenging. Stay connected with good friends from high school and make new friends. Participate in life, in your community, volunteer and remember Baz Luhrman’s great advice – wear sunscreen.
Love you!!!

-Teck's Mom

How does a picnic get so complicated?