You got the place all to yourself

“What the fuck.”

(Quite a few Risky Business references so I suggest you check it out. Oh, and it’s gonna be a little less PG this time, sorry.)

Hey! It’s what Tom Cruise said and look where he stood at the end of the (career launching) movie Risky Business. He got to drive around in his Father’s Porsche, (as much backwards forwards but hell, it’s a Porsche.) got laid, gained a few bucks, lost a few bucks and soaked the Porsche in Lake Michigan. Pretty crazy huh? Yeah, that’s what I thought after I watched it.
So of course when given the opportunity to have the time of my life and maybe even top Joel Goodsen what did I do? Did I throw a giant party (A party that is going to stop you from talking about the Food Fight?)? Did I get so wasted I couldn’t find my own feet? Did I invite a bunch of girls over to have sex totally unprotected while doing intravenous drugs at the same time? Would the story be funny if I did? No (No). No. No. No. There would be none of that. So, if none of that what did I do?
Well, Friday at work I strained my calf muscle while pushing hundreds of carts through inches of snow. I was offered a job in the furniture department, which will ultimately lengthen my stay in hell (Wal-Mart). After work I went to my friends house where I sat and watched a game of Risk go horribly awry, whilst watching a Kung Fu parody and hearing that Matt Good is sold out. I continued home to watch some Arrested Development while I had A beer. And, unfortunately, was able to locate my feet with ease.
Saturday, I didn’t have to work until 4:30 so I had sometime to get over my Friday night drinking binge. I watched the men’s Bronze medal hockey game, y’know, the one the Canadians should’ve completely bypassed. I stumbled upon a TV show hosted by a rapping Arab, which was hilarious. The hilarity was cut short though, as I realized it was time for work (Which once again, to my surprise, wasn’t fun). So now I’m hanging out at home, watching a movie, I’m on my second beer. Still able to find my feet. Oh, you wanna know what I’m watching? Risky Business o’course. Maybe it’ll stir up a few new ideas for my next weekend alone.

-Teck

The dream is always the same.

The Tear-Aways just don't cut it

For a very long time I have been searching high an low for something very few people have. Walking through the hallways my lack of fashion sense is shoved in my face. Oh! I know how to match when it comes to clothing... Unfortunately, that’s the extent of it. What is different about these people (aside from their style of course)? Is it something that comes naturally and I was unlucky enough to miss out on the talent? Is there a secret store I don’t know about? With a one stop wardrobe-of-style package? Is it that I was so caught up in the norm that I didn’t notice my closet filling with surfer brands?
In grade six you could hear me coming miles away because of the track pants I would wear five days a week (Oh shut-up you wore 'em too!). I didn’t have to worry about what people thought about me. Ahh the days before conformity, when it was fine to only wash when faced with the dilemma of “Bed or Bath”. As we all know, it doesn’t stay that way forever. I was moved from an Elementary school in Coalhurst into grade seven at Hamilton Junior High and soon after realized that my track pants weren’t going to cut it. The change in schools was the beginning of my collection of surf company shirts. Why did I buy them? Couldn't tell ya, I don’t surf…I live in Canada. Gone were the days of originality for me. It's time to do something about it. Hopefully I can find that secret store.
So prepare for a new Teck! I’m gonna come up with a style that’s gonna blow your mind! Then again…what if you make fun of me? Well I can’t have any of that and neither can you. “Conform OK, it’s just easier.”

-Teck

Zaugg reads da Blog!

P.S. Check out the comments section on the previous post where your President gives his final address! It’s a great way to sign-off and I’m glad I was able to host it. Thanks to everyone who’s visiting the site and I hope you keep comin’ back!

Interview with a Suspended President

In light of the events that ensued on Monday, February 13, 2006 I decided to strike up an interview with you’re President Jeff Arnold. Strap yourselves in for a wild talk including: Life, Chaos and Presidency.

Teck: So, I guess I will start with the question How did this get started?

Jeff: Well basically Drew and I were sitting in the cafeteria on Wednesday and we were thinking about how bland our lives are. We are students in all pure classes who do pretty well, so we decided that we have nothing to lose so we’re going to pull a crazy stunt like a food fight.

Teck: At any point in the conversation did the consequences come into question?

Jeff: Definitely. Basically, every point the consequences came up, we came up with the worst possible consequence was. We then realized that the worst that could possibly happen is to be expelled from Grad. But we decided that it was a risk we were totally willing to take, at that point we were willing to face suspension and we knew it would be inevitable.

Teck: What was the game plan?

Jeff: I was situated at the front by the French girl table, Drew was at our Blue Train table, he lifted his hands to show 30 seconds, I waved 20, he waved 10, and we both counted in our heads, our table yelled food fight, and chaos ensued. We had tons of stuff ready in our arsenal such as pies, cakes, pudding, you name it. And SO many things flew through that air...!

Teck: I, unfortunately, was not a witness to the chaos would you please describe some of the highlights.

Jeff: The highlight would have been cleaning finding the weirdest food thrown, I laughed so hard when I stumbled upon a hot dog, a full apple and someone even threw a battery! Some one also threw chocolate milk directly at the roof, there was food EVERYWHERE. Every single kid in that cafeteria threw SOMETHING.
Another highlight was seeing the teachers who tried to quell the uprising being hit with items. One teacher who tried to wave the crowd to stop was hit in the head with a sandwich, and one poor substitute teacher on her first day of supervision was PELTED with pudding.

Teck: Hahah! I heard a kid say he wailed a full apple at a girl’s chest.

Jeff: Oh man haha! The stories don't even end there! It was a danger zone! I ducked for cover and when I poked my head up, a potato coming at a hundred miles an hour JUST missed my head. It was definitely chaotic to say the least...

Teck: Did you have a target going in or was it just a free for all?

Jeff: We all wanted to hit Dave Ptycia. He was a doubter since we brought it up, and it's people like him who make the world so...boring. Basically, Drew and I believe that life is for living, and as immature as it seems, this was living life. But, I guess, it was mainly a free for all. I know that I threw blindly.

Teck: You were caught (obviously), what were the consequences and what was the process that you had to follow?

Jeff: At first I went with outright denial of having anything to do with it. Then I realized I was just talking in circles, so I straight up confessed. Drew and I were the orchestrators. Anyways, Mr. Groft is a brilliant man, he has a BS detector that is VERY finely tuned, he has obviously dealt with many people before Drew and myself.
I visited with Groft, Drew was sent to Zaugg. Drew said he had a hard time keeping still and straight faced. He, many times burst into laughter in front of Zaugg which pissed him off like crazy. My conference was a bit more serious, seeing as how I was the President at LCI. The admin team was very upset with me.

Teck: I think everyone would like to know if they said anything about revoking your presidency.

Jeff: Definitely. First thing Mr. Groft did was demand a resignation. I of course will comply with anything that is demanded of me, but not before a discussion. Admin was upset that I was using my "leadership skills" in negative ways. I still fail to see anything negative about throwing an apple pie, I'm sorry. But will I continue as President? Chances are very likely no.

Teck: Was it worth it?

Jeff: Absolutely, this will leave a legacy that Drew and I will never forget. It also (ironically) leaves my Presidential legacy. There won’t be an ATM Machine, or dance this year, but there certainly was a massive food fight! Groft and Brack are a very clever administration team and I give props to them for suspending our asses, because quite frankly; we deserve it!

Teck: Finally, who's gonna take over for you?

Jeff: Hopefully someone who threw something.

That concludes the interview with our former president Jeff Arnold. I’ll be back soon with a usual thought provoking piece. I just thought that I would keep you up with current events.

-Teck

I voted Langhofer

Fun is SO Yesterday

You don’t have a ticket for the Dance yet do ya? I didn’t think so.
Last week my social class had a discussion about the strange twists in “school dance” popularity. It seems that a few years ago LCI held a dance that was shoulder to shoulder with students just lookin' ta party. There were so many people in fact that because of the heat some dancers had to leave the floor so they could catch their breath. "It was like a sauna." Back in the day everyone was into just havin’ a good time. Their class president didn’t have to come on the announcements telling them that if they were unable to sell 100 tickets the dance wasn’t going to happen. They didn’t have to close half the gym to give the illusion that there were more people than there were. What happened to us!? What is the world coming to!? We’ve stumbled upon a time where even Cyndi Lauper is afraid to have fun. Gone are the hippie days of peace and love. The need for social acceptance, it seems, has overtaken our freedom to have a good time.
I noticed what I just hit you in the face with a few years ago (around my introduction to high school drama) and immediately adopted a new philosophy. My own. I decided from then on I would no longer allow my fear of being ridiculed trap me in the “No Fun Zone.” I realized, when an amazing woman by the name of Sharon Peat said “If you’re too cool to do the hokey-pokey then you are just too cool”, I wasn’t being true to myself or the people around me. I was keeping the real Teck sucluded from the words that will never hurt me. (Sticks and stones are quite the opposite.) I was free to do what I wanted to do because I didn’t care anymore! I celebrated and continue to celebrate by doing things most people are shocked by, but we'll get to the celebrations later. Teck's way of life comes very highly recommended from those who have adopted it since the founding. Give it a shot! Come out to the dance on Thursday, February 9th and see what I'm talkin' 'bout. 'Cause being the cool kid in school isn’t going to give you much to talk about.

Put your right hand in…

I’ll think you’re cool.

-Teck

Put your right hand out

Let me know what you think!